Rabbit hole

John: Glad you enjoyed the movie. It seemed a bit depressing from what I saw of it - sort of a perfect example of the Buddhist notion of excessive attachment.

Me: I don't blame her for the "excessive" attachment. She tried, nothing worked: group therapy, God, friends, colleagues or families; even by erasing the markers of her son's existence. She eventually found solace in communicating with the teenage driver who killed her son. He described the parallel universe and "rabbit hole"-adventure in his comic book. it is a movie does not have much plot, but the quality of the story telling and acting make the pain of loss and struggle for out so tangible. we are human, we attach to things we love, and we struggle to get through darkness.

John: I don't blame her for her attachment either, it is certainly considered normal to have attachment like that in our society. But, it is this type of attachment that is the source of much of our unhappiness.

If we attach ourselves to our good looks, then we become lost when they fade. If we attach ourselves to the idea of being young, then we feel lost when we start to age. It is okay to love our friends and loved ones, but the notion of attachment is somewhat stronger than that. It suggests that we somehow define ourselves through that association and when we lose those loved ones, we have a hard time existing without them.

Personally, it would hurt really badly if I lost any of my kids and my grief might follow a similar path to what we saw in the movie. But, at least I would understand the nature of that grief.

Me: It is a way to teach yourself how to get out of unhappiness, i agree.
But, detachment can be a passive attitude. Most of the Buddhists choose to escape the conventional sense of life and into a world with no pain but also no joy

Another song of the day

Have I Told You Lately that I love you?
Have I told you there's no one else above you?
Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness,
Ease my troubles, that's what you do.

For the morning sun in all it's glory,
Meets the day with hope and comfort too,
You fill my life with laughter, somehow you make it better,
Ease my troubles, that's what you do.

There's a love less defined,
And it's yours and it's mine,
Like the sun.
And at the end of the day,
We should give thanks and pray,
To The One, to The One.

Have I Told You Lately that I love you?
Have I told you there's no one else above you?
Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness,
Ease my troubles, that's what you do.

There's a love less defined,
And its yours and its mine,
Like the sun. And at the end of the day,
We should give thanks and pray,
To The One, to The One.

Have I Told You Lately That I Love you?
Have I told you there's no one else above you?
Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness,
Ease my troubles, that's what you do.

Take away all my sadness, fill my life with gladness,
Ease my troubles, that's what you do.

Take away all my sadness, fill my life with gladness,
Ease my troubles, that's what you do.

Too busy to write

Have not written anything to myself for a while. When life is so occupied, hardly having any room for free thoughts. Everyday seems chasing deadline, and dealing with immediate urgencies, and managing time for exercise and being with loved ones. Made an offer to a house, very excited for moving, and the decoration mood is back to me again.

A balanced life? Hard to keep. Am I over indulged myself in work and “fame”? or it is just the nature of my profession, and my role as a single mom? Hard to figure it out completely, but each of my day is so fulfilled, and appreciate more of stretching myself in bed in the end of the day and falling sleep soundly.

Stay with me

Raindrops, Fall From, Everywhere
I Reach Out, For You, But Your Not There
So I Stood, Waiting, In The Dark
With Your Picture, In My Hands
Story Of a Broken Heart

Stay With Me
Don't Let Me Go
Cause I Can't Be Without You
Just Stay With Me
And Hold Me Close
Because I've Built My World Around You
And I Don't Wanna Know What's It Like Without You
So Stay with Me
Just Stay With Me

I'm Trying And Hoping, For The Day
When my touch is enough
To Take The Pain Away
Cause I've Searched For So Long
The Answer Is Clear
We'll be OK if We Don't Let It Disappear

Stay With Me
Don't let Me go
Cause I Can't Be Without You
Just Stay With Me
And Hold Me Close
Because I've Built My World Around You
And I Don't Wanna Know What's it Like Without You
So Stay with Me
Just Stay With Me

I've searched my heart over
So many many times
No you and I, is like no stars to light the sky at night
Our Picture Hangs Out Of Tune
Remind Me Of The Days
You Promised Me We'd Always
And Never Go Away
That's Why I Need You To Stay

Stay With Me
Don't let Me go
Cause I Can't Be Without You
Just Stay With Me
And Hold Me Close
Because I've Built My World Around You
And I Don't Wanna Know What's It Like Without You
So Stay with Me
Just Stay With Me